I’m hiring a cleaner. DO NOT TRY AND STOP ME!

26 Oct

I am sick of living in squalor.

I am hiring a cleaner. DO NOT try and stop me.

I just need someone to give everything a good scrub at least one a month. Don’t worry. This lady-of-leisure will manage to keep herself busy on the day there aren’t here – cooking, tidying, vacuuming, sweeping, buying groceries, wiping snotty noses, doing laundry, ironing, banging the crap out of my rug, changing the bed sheets…I’m tired just writing this).

Ten years ago I hired a cleaner. I’d do a pre-clean before they arrived because I was so embarrassed by my neglected home and the amount of crap and dog hair that was on every surface. I’d also pitch in while they were cleaning, despite their protests. I felt guilty. I felt like a slob.

The reality is that I live in a very old home that always looks dirty no matter how much I clean. I’ve given up trying to make surfaces glisten. I’m going to settle for sanitary.

I will not pre-clean. I will give them plenty to do so their minimum two hours flies by and I won’t feel guilty. They want the work! They are happy to have a new regular client who no longer has indoor dogs. Yes, they may have to peel a forgotten fruit roll up from the bottom of the lounge but so what? They are professionals. I’m sure they’ve seen more disgusting houses than mine.

I work most days, I’m doing my Masters in Creative Writing, I have three children and they have a million activities and I can afford it. It’s only $80! I blow that much at the shops on lunch and a couple of puzzles from the toy store.

I plan to embrace and enjoy what I see as a new phase in my life. My name is Jo and I need help cleaning my home. I’m going to hire help. AND YOU CAN’T STOP ME (yes, I’m talking to myself).

22 Responses to “I’m hiring a cleaner. DO NOT TRY AND STOP ME!”

  1. theroommom October 26, 2012 at 8:47 pm #

    I truly believe having someone clean my house once a month is good for my marriage. I have to admit I do do the pre-clean, though. Actually, it’s a pre-pick-up because I want them cleaning– not picking up all of the Lego pieces and Barbie shoes that litter my entire upstairs.

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      I love it. Good for my marriage. It would be. Happy wife, happy life! x

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